Free! Kingsford "odorless" charcoal starter

Free: one quart of Kingsford odorless charcoal starter fluid. Well actually... I used about an ounce of it, so I guess it's really just 31 ounces. Why they don't sell smaller quantities for the ritualistic destruction of not-so-flammable relationship memorabilia is beyond me.

If you'd like to get your hands on this prize, send me an email with an amusing anecdote involving some sort of flame, fire, accelerant, cooking mishap, candle wax gone wild, whatever. It doesn't have to be true - just make me laugh.

I'll give y'all until the end of June (11:59:59 pm Monday night) to submit an entry. If you REALLY want the charcoal starter before Tuesday, just say so - I'm also a sucker for a good pity plea.